Beginning With Him – Feb, 2008

BEGINNING WITH HIM … FEB, 2008

A note from doug:
From time to time, at the beginning of the month, I like to send out a compilation message of various items I…ve accumulated over time. So, here goes…

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AFTER CHRISTMAS POEM

‘Twas the month after Christmas, and all through the house,
Nothing would fit me, not even a blouse.

The cookies I’d nibbled, the eggnog I’d taste,
At the holiday parties had gone to my waist.

When I got on the scales there arose such a number!
When I walked to the store (less a walk than a lumber).

I’d remember the marvelous meals I’d prepared,
The gravies and sauces and beef nicely rared.

The wine and the rum balls, the bread and the cheese,
And the way I’d never said, “No thank you, please.”

As I dressed myself in my husband’s old shirt,
And prepared once again to do battle with dirt.

I said to myself, as I only can,
“You can’t spend a winter disguised as a man!”

So–away with the last of the sour cream dip,
Get rid of the fruit cake, every cracker and chip.

Every last bit of food that I like must be banished,
‘Till all the additional ounces have vanished.

I won’t have a cookie–not even a lick,
I’ll want only to chew on a long celery stick.

I won’t have hot biscuits, or corn bread, or pie,
I’ll munch on a carrot and quietly cry.

I’m hungry, I’m lonesome, and life is a bore,
But isn’t that what January is for?

Unable to giggle, no longer a riot,
Happy New Year to all and to all a good diet!

— Author Unknown

* * *
AN ACRONYM OF …PEACE…
P raising no matter what
E xperiencing joy
A ccepting God’s will
C ontent with life
E xpecting His blessings

— Author Unknown

* * *
AN ACRONYM OF …PRAYER …
P raise
R equesting
A doration
Y ielding
E xalting
R eliance

— Author Unknown

* * *
A CAN OF WORMS

A minister decided that a visual demonstration would add emphasis to his Sunday sermon.

Four worms were placed into four separate jars.

The first worm was put into a container of alcohol.
The second worm was put into a container of cigarette smoke.
The third worm was put into a container of chocolate syrup.
The fourth worm was put into a container of good clean soil.

At the conclusion of the sermon, the Minister reported the following results:

The first worm in alcohol – Dead.
The second worm in cigarette smoke – Dead
The third worm in chocolate syrup – Dead
The fourth worm in good clean soil – Alive.

So the Minister asked the congregation – What can you learn from this demonstration?

Maxine was sitting in the back, quickly raised her hand and said, “As long as you drink, smoke and eat chocolate, you won’t have worms!”

That pretty much ended the service —

— Author Unknown

* * *
THREE TIPS TO ZAP STRESS BEFORE IT STRIKES

The symptoms of stress usually sneak up on us … building slowly, then culminating in physical discomfort, like headaches, back pains, or stiff necks. Why not stop stress in its tracks? There’s no one-size-fits-all approach, but a combination of stress management techniques can keep everyday tensions and anxieties from getting the best of you.
1) Take one minute per hour each day to just breathe and do nothing … no phones, no lists, no responsibilities. Just as your cell phone needs recharging, so do you.
2) Get better organized. Many people spend 20 percent of their time looking for things. Label your belongings, alphabetize files. It may sound mundane, but order will help you save time and energy.
3) Laugh at yourself and try to make others laugh. Playfulness and a sense of humor can take the edge off some of life’s situations.

— Author Unknown

* * *
CHRISTIAN ONE LINERS

Don’t let your worries get the best of you; remember, Moses started out as a basket case.
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Some people are kind, polite, and sweet-spirited until you try to sit in their pews.
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Many folks want to serve God, but only as advisors.
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It is easier to preach ten sermons than it is to live one.
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The good Lord didn’t create anything without a purpose, but mosquitoes come close.
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When you get to your wit’s end, you’ll find God lives there.
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People are funny; they want the front of the bus, the middle of the road, and the back of the church.
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Opportunity may knock once, but temptation bangs on your front door forever.
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Quit griping about your church; if it was perfect, you couldn’t belong.
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If the church wants a better pastor, it only needs to pray for the one it has.
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God Himself does not propose to judge a man until he is dead. So why should you?
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Some minds are like concrete thoroughly mixed up and permanently set.
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Peace starts with a smile.
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I don’t know why some people change churches; what difference does it make which one you stay home from?
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A lot of church members who are singing “Standing on the Promises” are just sitting on the premises.
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We were called to be witnesses, not lawyers or judges.
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Be ye fishers of men. You catch them – He’ll clean them.
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Coincidence is when God chooses to remain anonymous.
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Don’t put a question mark where God put a period.
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Don’t wait for 6 strong men to take you to church.
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Forbidden fruits create many jams.
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God doesn’t call the qualified, He qualifies the called.
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God grades on the cross, not the curve.
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God loves everyone, but probably prefers “fruits of the spirit” over “religious nuts!”
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God promises a safe landing, not a calm passage.
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He who angers you, controls you!
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If God is your Co-pilot – swap seats!
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Prayer: Don’t give God instructions — just report for duty!
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The task ahead of us is never as great as the Power behind us.
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The Will of God never takes you to where the Grace of God will not protect you.
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We don’t change the message, the message changes us.
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You can tell how big a person is by what it takes to discourage him.
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The best mathematical equation I have ever seen: 1 cross + 3 nails = 4 given.

— Author Unknown

I hope you liked the selections!!

— doug

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